A New Year´s Prayer

I am thankful that when the clock struck twelve that fateful 9th of December, I turned 30 and the world remained intact.
At least my world.
I felt my heart race once or twice leading up to the moment.
I sensed a split-second anxiety wondering whether there’s an unspoken rule that once I turn 30, I would have to start behaving, well, 30-ish.
Shortly after the candle was blown out and being surrounded by friends with old souls and hearts that are forever young, I realized, it’s just another year.
I will always be the same kid I have been deep down.

Eventually, I started to notice a difference-
That I appreciate my youth more,
That I recognize its enduring, steadfast quality,
That I am proud of it beyond expression.

I am thankful for a new era in my life and the chance for a new beginning.
I am thankful for having been honed over the years for the adversities that face me today. That I had the foresight in the distant past of the challenges that I would have to one day endure.

I pray that I am as strong as I have to be, as forbearing as I would like to be.
I pray for the right perspective and attitude towards my life to get through day to day.
I pray for understanding and compassion from myself and from others that I may have peaceful rest every given night.
I pray for forgiveness and kindness form my past and for healing.

My thanksgiving I lift up to the heavens for accepting my imperfect self and my imperfect faith and for allowing me to at least try to be even just a little closer to perfect.

I pray for this world that has endured every conceivable pain, destruction and hopeless situation, and yet it persists and endures. May I be just like this world and the goodness that it continues to reflect. May I be a light, no matter how faint, but bright enough to shine in the darkest corners of people’s hearts.

- Journal entry, 010808